A Letter to the Skeptical Partner

Dear Skeptical Partner,⠀

I know you’re wondering why your pregnant spouse/partner wants to hire a doula. You might be thinking: “What’s the point? What difference does it make? Am I not good enough?” ⠀

You know your pregnant partner better than anyone. There’s no one else in the world who can do what you can. Your role is not one that can be replaced, duplicated or imitated. They’re with you for this reason! Your relationship is crucial to this labour & birth. ⠀

Oxytocin is the hormone necessary for the advancement of labour. This is achieved when a person feels comfortable, cozy, warm, loved, seen & heard. & something tells me that nobody can make your pregnant partner feel these things like you can.⠀

Here’s the thing: It can be incredibly overwhelming feeling like it’s all on you. It’s hard for one person to enter the birth space & suddenly become a 5-in-1: the partner, the person who has to keep their cool, the birth coach, the library of information, the person who needs to remember each medical intervention & what they all mean. I’m there to remind you of what you learned in your prenatal classes; to take that overwhelm away. I’ll remind you that it’s okay if you need to take a break, take a nap, go get a snack, take a walk or make a phone call. I will be that information guide, that voice of reason, that sigh of relief. Because I’m not just here for her. I’m here for you, too. To help make this a positive experience for BOTH of you. ⠀

I take that pressure off of you so that you can do what you’re meant to do: be there for her & experience the magic of your baby being born. ⠀

Sincerely,⠀

Tara ⠀

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